October 2010:
My father died. Less than 3 hours after his funeral, this sister in law of mine, showed up her true color. Decided she’s going to introduce herself to my family as a big drama queen, she succeeded to make chaos in my big family. My mom and my uncle ( my mom’s youngest brother) fought. Our family get humiliated. I can only cry, to think that the soil on my father’s grave is not even dry up yet, but somebody already successfully and happily to turn my family upside down. And the person who doing it, is part of our main family member.
The next day, she added more drama while we still in deep grief. She fake a full syndrome of a maniac, and acted as it’s the result of my mom abusing her. She acted so well, she even got hospitalized for days. The thing is, when all this happened, when she pretended and faking all the seizures, all her threats to jump off from 2nd floor of my house, my mom was not even presence. The logical reason sister in law acted this way was: she tried to get away with her act and turn the table on my mom. Since that day, she never stopped to make tactics just to show the world that my mom is an abusive evil witch, and she’s the victim.
My brother did nothing.
He lets his wife get away with this drama act and humiliated our family to the bone. Meanwhile, in my ears, i can still hear his promises in front of my dad’s corpse, that he will take good care of us, mom and me, and middle brother. And i can still remember my brother saying in hospital while dad in comma, he will try his best to keep our family’s name stay good.
Disappointed much? Tell me about it.
July 2011:
I got married. This is what my brother come up to me with words: I came because i have to, not because i want to. I cried my eyes off to his response. Already sad enough because i could not have my dad walk me down the aisle, and my oldest brother is the only person i imagine to sit down with my mom on the stage during reception; still my brother had the meanest response. I know we were fighting because sister in law decided to make humiliation project #2: by not coming to my wedding. I kind of expecting for her to come, to showed to us some decent apology, and my best intension to make up. I was so ready to forgive her. But apparently psycho sister in law of mine thought she’s too cool and too pretty to come to my wedding. She had to showed the whole wide world that our family still in chaos, and she refused to come to my wedding.
Planning a wedding with 500 invitation for only 3 months preparing is already difficult enough, but i have to deal with the result my sister in law not coming to my wedding. The crap and bullshit, the annoying elderly comments from the family. I have to forgive her and my uncle everybody said. I have to invite my uncle, or my wedding is not going to be legally approved by the tribe tradition. I REFUSED to make traditional wedding, i didn’t want to spend more money for stupid things people told me to do anyway. But all those complicated craps that i had to deal with during my wedding; made me thinking:
WHAT THE HELL DID I DO TO HER, TO MY SISTER INLAW, THAT SHE KEEPS MAKE MY LIFE MISERABLE SINCE I KNOW HER? I NEVER RUIN HER WEDDING, NEVER HUMILIATED HER FAMILY, SO WTH???
My brother apologized in behalf of his wife, but i refused to count that in. Nobody’s should take responsibility for other’s fault. And he PROMISED that his wife will apologize as soon as she get a chance. To me. To us.
Until today, there’s no such thing. No apologize nor congratulation wishes whatsoever to my wedding. And yes, people still think we’re family.
Some little hiccups:
Some of friends been telling me (all the way previous to 3 years before the due date) to have a wedding in my hometown instead overseas. They made me believed that they really happy for me and really want to come to my wedding. And the thing is, lots of them could not make it. I still can understand. Until i hear their LAME excuses and reasons: TRAFFIC JAM. TRAFFIC JAM. TRAFFIC JAM.
fyi: i pay A LOT MORE just to reserve and make my wedding reception on sunday night, just to make sure and full consideration of their convenience to come. And traffic jam in my hometown is happening everyday, every single hours these days. it’s unbearably unpredictable anymore.
My answer: IT’S NOT LIKE EVERYDAY I GET MARRIED, YOU MORON. IT’S ONCE IN A LIFETIME OCCASION AND YOU MISSED IT JUST BECAUSE OF TRAFFIC JAM, AND YOU TOLD THAT TO MY FACE? 1*&*(&*^&*^&^&%^&(*()_)()^&^^%&^%!!!!!!!
Oh here’s another answer for a pregnant friend of mine: MY FEET HURTS. But yeah, i can come to other wedding and doing a lot of other things the next week according to the pictures on her Facebook page. NICE TRY.
January 2012:
Tricked, used and betrayed by a best friend for 20 something years. She left her family, a husband and two kids, using letter of reference to come to United States made by me. As a matter of fact, she’s run away with a guy who she met in some chatting room. She told her family that she’s visiting me. Her family asked me for her where-about being and i feel guilty as charged. She still missing in action after 6 months, and still mad at my self for trusting her, for giving in so easily, for not paying close attention when she told me about her crush over the internet. I am disappointed, she could not trusted me enough, not even drop a single email or a phone call to tell me if she’s okay or not.
I still have bad dreams, picturing her in a ditch somewhere. But on some days, i somehow day dreaming for some reason she will be showing up at my door.
I must have the most rotten luck in this year in social or friendship matter this year. I tried my best to become good friend, understanding sister, waiting for them to keep their promises. Like a beggar, i painfully waiting for them to give me some decent respect. Some empathy to understand that I, like them, have feelings.
And the thing is; the most hurtful part is; is not about DONT MAKE PROMISES YOU CANT KEEP, but rather TRYING YOUR BEST TO KEEP YOUR PROMISES. Because sometimes, there’s a big difference between YOU ARE NOT ABLE TO and YOU CHOOSE YOU DONT WANT TO.
